“What does love have to do with it?” You might ask this question if you were thinking about leadership at the office. And I would say to you “everything”, and not blink an eye. I would mean it with the utmost conviction and it would have nothing to do with how someone else felt about you or any feeling of self-absorption.
The question truly is “how much do I love myself?” How much do you love you? Once you answer this question, then you can look to others. Until this is resolved within you, others are yet to be recognized. When you love you, truly love you, deeply love you a whole new world is opened to you. What do I mean by this?
Well, until you are able to love you with all your shortcomings, blessings, and gifts, it is most difficult to accept someone else with his or her shortcomings, blessings and gifts. Not only are you able to see the other person, you can feel and understand the other person. You can now see options that you could not fathom before. Not everyone thinks the way you do, feels the way you do, acts the way you do… what a blessing! However, when you know this and value this, you are more receptive to the differences, the gifts, the new ways of seeing, feeling and acting. Because you love you and accept you for who you are, you are able to learn, listen, and love in ways you could not before. You are able to hear that new idea, different from yours, without dismissing, but rather with curiosity, respect, and a willingness to try something new. It may work, it may not. However, together you will learn and grow with added understanding.
Because you love you, respect you, seek to understand you, you can now see beyond you with compassion, caring, and curiosity. Instead of saying, “that’s a terrible idea”. You might instead say, “I don’t agree with you, however, I understand you see it that way” or “I see your perspective, though I do not agree” or “tell me more, I don’t think I fully appreciate your point of view”. Each response says, you care and am curious, seeking or showing understanding. Likely, it’s the way you would want to be treated, heard, or engaged in a conversation.
When we give ourselves permission to love versus judge or fear, we can see differently, hear differently, act differently because our intentions are differently positioned to ignite poise, pause, peace, and purpose.
What do you want to see in your life for you – to be, to have, to do? What do you want to see in your life at home? What do you want to see in your life for your family? What do you want to see in your life at work – for you, your team, the organization, your customers? What do you want to see in your life in the community?
Start with love, good intentions. See the positive outcomes. Feel the joy of learning (sometimes it looks and feels like failure, it’s not! Learn and move forward.) Take action that will yield success. Make space for possibilities.
There is no space for doubt, where positive thoughts live. There is no place for discontent, where we know and show love for ourselves and for others.